Meditation is a big part of my life these days. I couldn’t encourage you more strongly to start a practice. It only takes a few minutes a day. If you’re curious but don’t know where to start, well, here are a few pointers.
Where should I meditate?
Fundamentally, you can meditate anywhere you like. It works just as well in a park, as it does on a train, or in your basement. But to start, it’s best to pick a location where you can practice regularly. Often a quiet place in your home is a good place to start. Pick somewhere that is quiet and ideally free of distractions. Turn off your phone or laptop, and sit.
How should I sit?
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You’ve probably see pictures of yogi’s sitting crosslegged in lotus position on a mountain. While that looks super cool, it’s totally not necessary to meditate. You can meditate in any position that’s comfortable.
Ideally you’re in a position where you’re upright and alert. Many people prefer starting on a cushion, legs crossed comfortably and back straight. But if that’s uncomfortable, try sitting in a chair, or stool, back straight and upright. Or other people prefer a mediation bench, on your knees. Lying down can work for some, but I wouldn’t recommend it for a beginner. You’re just too likely to fall asleep.
Whatever you choose, don’t strain. Make sure you’re comfortable, and alert. For me, crosslegged on a cushion works best.
How long should I be sitting for?
If you’re just beginning, start simply. It’s better to form a habit and keep a regular practice than to challenge yourself with long periods of suffering. 5-10 min a day is a great place to start. As this becomes easy, slowly increase your time. Personally, I try to sit for about 30 min each day. But this is a habit I’ve built up over years. If I have more time, I’ll occasionally try for a sit for a little bit longer. Occasionally up to an hour. And I aim for a week long retreat each year.
“You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes everyday – unless you’re too busy; then you should sit for an hour.” – Zen saying
What should I be doing?
There are many different forms of meditation and different ways to do it. A simple strategy for newcomers is to work on your concentration. Pick an object of focus, this is usually the breath but can be anything. Choose a sensation. Sounds in the room. Feelings in the body. Whatever you pick, try to keep your attention on the object. When you attention wanders, notice it and return to the object. That’s it! You’re meditating!
This is the main idea. To notice how your mind frequently wanders and how little time you actually spend in the present. It’s not to “eliminate thoughts” or feel “immediate peace”. Your mind will naturally wander and you can be in many states of mind and moods while meditating. The main idea is that slowly more and more time will be spent on your chosen area of focus. The other benefits will unfold naturally over time.
I still don’t know what to do? Help?!
If you’d prefer a guide of sorts, there are many apps and guided meditations that you can find online. Or attend a class sometime. Meditating in community is a nice way to build or strengthen a practice.
Here are a few guidance apps that others have found helpful
And for a meditation timer with free guided mediations I recommend and use:
What are some common pitfalls for beginners?
“My mind keeps wandering. I’m not any good at this.”
Don’t fret. Everyone’s mind keeps wandering. Especially at the beginning. Note your attitude towards yourself. Are you easily annoyed? Or hard on yourself? Can you have a more friendly and playful attitude towards your wandering mind?
When you notice yourself wandering off, try congratulating yourself and bring yourself back. Frequent positive reinforcement is a great way to build a skill. This is a skill. You will improve with time. But not every time. Sometimes, you’ll sit and do nothing but wander. Be kind to yourself, you are doing it right.
“I can’t sit for too long. My legs hurt too much.”
Frequently we can experience pain during our meditation. It can take us away from our chosen point of focus, and lead us to end our meditations early or be easily distracted. Don’t worry, this is common for many people.
There are often two ways to deal with pain when it becomes an issue in meditation.
One, is to make it an area of focus. Can you zoom into the pain? Where exactly is it? Can you define the boundaries of it? Is there a colour associated with the pain? Is it shifting in any way? Often people find that focusing on it shifts the intensity of the pain and often releases it.
Or, you can choose to focus away from the pain. Make the intention to keep your attention on your area of focus a lot stronger. Try not to be pulled away by the pain. No matter what. For some, this can also be an effective way to relieve your pain.
Or if it’s too much. Stop for a second. Move, release the pain, change positions if you have to. And then restart where you left off.
“I keep falling asleep”
Falling asleep in meditation is a common problem for many. I used to find myself asleep often. We are trying to find a balance between focus and relaxation, and sometimes we drift too far down the relaxation pathway.
A few things you can do to help to keep drifting off to sleep.
- Sit upright, with a straight back. When you notice yourself slumping forwards, make the effort to stay straight.
- Take a few big breaths through your mouth. Focus intensely on the sensation of the breath going through the mouth. This can be reenergizing for some.
- Change your object of focus for a minute or two. Instead of the breath, focus on body sensations, or the noise in the room. And then go back.
- Open your eyes and try to stay focused with your eyes open
- Stand up and try and finish your meditation while standing
Sometimes too, you’re just in need of some sleep. Go and rest and return to your meditation when you’re more alert.
Finally, the best way to learn about mediation is to just try and meditate. Try it for a few minutes. Bring your wandering mind back into concentration. And keep up a practice. Trust the process. You’ll see benefits over time. It’s been life changing for me. Good luck!